The Gift of Perspective: What We Wish We Knew Before Our Life Changes

This is the Life Shift podcast and these are the bonus episodes for our special Patreon page. Hello my friends.

What I love about the Life Shift podcast is, sure, some of these events are really hard to hear and experience, but I do find that every episode ends in some kind of inspirational way of hope and what we've learned as humans through the experiences that we go through.

What I like to do at the end of the story is ask my guests if they could go back to that person right before their Life Shift moment, what would they say?

And for some people, I asked for advice for people going through something similar and sometimes I ask just a random question that's in a similar vein.

And so this is one way that I get to hear what someone would say to that person, knowing full well it's not possible with the intention of anyone listening who might be going through something similar or similar experience, they have the opportunity to hear some inspirational words or something that resonates with them so that they feel a little less alone in their experiences. I just want to thank those of you who have been listening. So I hope you leave this episode feeling inspired.

So thank you and I hope you enjoy listening to this recap episode of the responses to if you could go back to that person right before your Life Shift moment, what would you say?

Well, so it's funny you say that. I actually have talked to him before and I do, you know, through therapy.

I, I don't know if you're familiar with IFS therapy, internal family systems where I do go back and I do talk to him. I have told him that, you know, I just tell him that I am here for you, somebody is here for you.

I, I talk to that 4 year old more often telling him that I am here for you, you are worthy and like you are loved. Because I didn't, I didn't feel loved for a large long portion of my life.

And so I talk to them often, to be honest with you, and I let them know that I'm here for you.

So just knowing that, you know, they're still part of me and they like and just knowing that they have somebody because growing up I felt like I didn't have anybody. Like I felt like no one was there for me. And so I, I didn't know that at the time. I didn't know what I was looking for.

And so it's nice to tell them that I am there for them and you know, I'm an adult now and you're going to be okay and that I love you.

My God, I don't even know how I could even explain what's about to happen to me. I think I would just say like, it's gonna be okay. And I'd be like, oh God, yeah, of course it's gonna be okay. What?

Like, but it's insane how the path was to okay, but you know, here, here we are.

Here we are.

Just, I would say shoulders back, chest out, take your hat off, you've got this. And just let go and trust. Because everything was out of my control. I felt like I'm the solution, I'm the problem.

The, like, I like to fix things, you know, I like to get in there and fix things. I like to find solutions, but I just couldn't. And it was destroying me knowing I had to watch this crumble and I couldn't do anything.

Yeah, let go and trust.

Wow. Well, you know, I would lose the element of surprise if I had inside information, you know.

And I think the surprise and the shock of it all was interlaced with the actual content of the conversation of which there was nothing to remember. Yeah.

So, you know, there might be a small amount of like, hey, don't take the meeting or hey, maybe, you know, there's some value in you deciding when the meeting is over and getting up and walking away rather than like sitting and tolerating the whole thing. Maybe there's something better by way of comfort that you could offer the colleague who's clearly suffering through this experience with you.

But otherwise I don't know that I would go back and make too many changes.

Yeah, just like high five on the way in. Good luck.

You got this.

Yeah.

I would tell him to enjoy more life and be more entrepreneurial and try more things. I started doing things now that I, I quitted a bit early on. So for instance, I went, I, I spoke about tennis.

I was playing tennis when I was a teenager and I quit and I resume now and I notice how you notice even in tennis details that when you are a young youth you didn't notice. So maybe I will, I, I would do more things but it's, it's easy when you have a self awareness of a grown up.

So it's, it's unfair towards, towards the child island.